Well, my friends, for this episode of Fake News with Greg B. Loken, you might need your tinfoil hat. Remember to subscribe and drop us a black heart in the comments.
The truth behind DOGE is finally coming into focus. Under the guise of building a master database to surveil and track immigrants, this cross-agency database will also be able to track and surveil anyone in the United States. The question that we should be asking: is this a violation of the 4th Amendment’s “Right to Privacy” and the 3rd Amendment’s “belief that an individual’s home should be free from agents of the state”? In a world where the data protection market was valued at $158.77 billion in 2024 and is projected to exceed $1.12 trillion by 2037. How safe is your personal data in the hands of a government that is less than transparent about the true purpose of President Musk and his DOGE goons? A White House staffer who spoke on the condition of anonymity was asked what King Donald would be doing with the database. They replied, “Him, I doubt he even knows about it. When he isn’t sleeping, he’s off playing golf. The real people pulling the levers of power in this country are the 2025 cabal. Who do you think is writing most of those Executive Orders? As far as what they plan to do with the database, well, what can’t they do? When almost everyone carries a smartphone, they always know where you are and what you are saying. The days of needing a warrant are coming to an end. With this database in place, it is like the government is sitting with you at your computer as you surf the web. As soon as Habeas Corpus is suspended, there will be nothing stopping the cabal from disapearing people they just don’t like.”
The unlicensed Dr. Casey Means has been nominated to be the next U.S. surgeon general. When asked, if confirmed what would be her first official act? She replied, “Oh, that’s an easy one. I’m going to have big signs put up in pharmacies and hospitals everywhere stating SURGEON GENERAL’S WARNING: Vaccines can be harmful to your health! It’s about time we inform the public about this insidious danger.”
It should be noted that The Late Great Hanabol Lecter is on the record as being opposed to vaccines, saying that it makes the meat stringy.
Jeanine Pirro is the latest Fox News host to kiss the cock ring of King Donald. After the loyalty kiss, King Donald stated, she is “incredibly well qualified” … to be appointed interim U.S. attorney for the District of Columbia. This will be the 23rd Fox News employee Trump has recruited for his administration. We are not pointing this out because we believe that there may or may not be an Illuminati connection at play here.
One of the advanced Secret Service agents for the upcoming trip to Qatar, who spoke on the condition of anonymity, stated, “I was checking out one of the clubs that are on the list of possible visits, when I swear I saw Jeffrey Epstein. If it wasn’t him, then he has a twin brother with a fondness for young girls, too!”
Nine out of ten Ancient Astronaut Theorists believe the reason for King Donald continuously dozing off is because, as a shapeshifting reptilian alien, he has entered into a molting phase. It would also explain the orange makeup that he wears. The make-up is really a coating of nanobots that are emitting a pulsating blue light that is at a frame rate in excess of what the human eye can process. As orange and blue are complementary colors on the light color wheel, we perceive the color as orange, because orange is more vibrant to our eyes. When asked who else might be a shapeshifting reptilian alien, they said, Ron Vara, Mark Zuckerberg, Jeff Bezos, and his fiancée, Lauren.
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